I get along very well with his mother these days. Nearly all of our communication deals with things that our son needs, or, what is going on in his life. We also text pictures to each other of fun things that we are doing with him.
There were times when I wondered how a divorce would affect him. I wondered if he would be resentful that his mom and dad were no longer together. Thankfully, it never became an issue.
I don't get to see him as frequently as I would like, but, I understand that his mother misses him just as much when she isn't with him as I do when he's with her. We both dread when "our time" is up, but, both know that he'll be happy as soon as we hug each other goodbye.
In a way it's a good thing. Because the time we share isn't done every day, the hours that we have together mean that much more. For some odd reason, the kid never gets tired of hearing how amazing he is.
He really is.
More than that though, he genuinely is a miracle.
Not too long after getting out of the Army, I was diagnosed with Cancer. I didn't have insurance at the time, but, was lucky enough to get steered to the Medical College of Wisconsin. I was kind of a guinea pig. The treatment often consisted of a group of medical students being present. I did have a doctor that was in charge, and, I'll never forget him. The reason I bring this up is because the treatment involved surgery to remove the tumor. A lot of surgery. I was told that I probably wouldn't have children as a result of everything that they did to me.
Well, I did.
When we found out Ben's mom was pregnant, I was stunned. (in a good way) Almost in disbelief. We already had a house together, and were in a committed relationship, but, the news changed everything. It pushed a wedding ahead of schedule.
I may no longer be a husband, but, I will always be a son. And a dad. Even though the marriage didn't last, I can honestly say that my appreciation for fatherhood and motherhood increased.
I'm getting ready to go pick my son up now at his mother's house. (We split everything up 50/50. She got the inside of the house. I got the outside :))
Right now I miss him, but, that is soon going to change. He's helped me learn not to start counting down how much time we have left, but, to fully appreciate every moment that we have together. Every minute that I'm with him is proof that miracles take place.
When we're not together, I have dedicated my time to making sure that his future is brighter. These days it's taking a lot more effort than I'd care to expend, but, it keeps me occupied. It helps speed up the time that we're not together.
When I go to pick him up after school, I always have a smile on my face. That place is filled with miracles. Maybe one of your miracles is there?
Not only am I thankful on Father's Day to have a dad, but, I am thankful to be a dad. I'm thankful to believe in miracles. They take place every day. I'm thankful to those of you reading this who help me make a better future for our miracles. It's like lighting someone else's candle with your own. The light on yours doesn't get dimmer while you do it, but, it helps everyone by doing so.
So, THANK YOU! is what this is basically all about. Happy Father's Day everyone. Appreciate what you have to appreciate. It's not what you don't have that's important, but what you do have and being grateful for.
Without a son, I'm not a dad - and the sooner I hit the "publish" button to magically make this appear on the interwebs, the sooner I get to share some smiles with my miracle...